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Can we go back to when the week was dragging? Now it's a step below that. I've been really tired, today...exhausted to the full extent of the word. My mom was up here earlier, so I got a short nap, which helped. Then tonight, out of nowhere I started having cramps. Honestly, one minute I'm feeling fine, the next, not so hot. About 30 minutes after the cramps started, I went into the bathroom to find out I was spotting. Not a lot, but enough to freak me out. I left to take AJ & Aaron for their drive to get them to sleep and called my mom. I told her what had happened and asked her if I should be worried. She told me to call the U. I debated...I didn't want to call them if it was something silly or stupid, but I didn't want to not call them and wish I had. I finally scared myself enough to call and leave a message with the answering service.

Dr. Hatasaka called back about 10 minutes later. I told him we did the Cryo-transfer on the 4th, that I was scheduled for our pregnancy test on Sunday and that I started cramping and bleeding this evening. His response? "Oh, shoot!" Not the most reassuring. But he was great, asking me a bunch of questions and telling me not to freak out just yet....this could be a sign of something bad or a sign of ... nothing. He said to keep going with the progesterone and estrogen and to come in for the pregnancy test still on Sunday. He said he would be there Sunday, so we could talk to him then with any more concerns. He was so nice, reassuring, and personable. Before we hung up he said, "I'll keep my fingers crossed for you and we'll see you on Sunday." What a great doctor!

I've still been cramping, but not bleeding too bad, so I'm feeling a little better. I asked Scott and Adam to give me a blessing, which they did. Can I just say I love the Priesthood? It was so nice to have these Priesthood holders anoint me and give me a blessing. (Scott anointed, Adam sealed.) In the blessing, I was reassured that Heavenly Father is mindful of me and my situation. There was a lot of talk of trials and strength in opposition, a lot of talk of staying faithful no matter what the outcome, and a lot of talk of the great role of Motherhood and how important it is for me to teach AJ & Aaron the gospel. I was reminded to read my scriptures, be humble and repent when needed, and to trust that the Lord knows and sees what we cannot. It was a very peaceful blessing, but not a very reassuring one. :) I wanted to hear "don't worry, everything will be okay." But I was (and am) filled with peace and feeling very calm. And that worries me a little.

Adam and I have talked this whole time about how this is in the Lord's hands, and it has to be according to his will. It's hard to realize that we've done everything we can, and now have to wait to see what the Lord has in store for us. Like I said, if I thought the week was dragging before, what is it now? Just a few more hours....